A Marriage Book with a Difference!
A Revolutionary Message
"I've been married 35 years and have not heard this taught."
"This is the key that I have been missing."
"You connected all the dots for me."
"As a counselor, I have never been so excited about any material."
"You're on to something huge here."
A Simple Message
A 'wife has one driving need—to feel loved. When that need is met, she is happy. A husband has one driving need—to feel respected. When that need is met, he is happy. When either of these needs isn't met, things get crazy. Love and Respect reveals why spouses react negatively to each other, and how they can deal with such conflict quickly, easily and biblically.
A Message That Works
Based on over three decades of counseling, as well as scientific and biblical research, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs and his -wife, Sarah, have already taken the Love and Respect message across America and are changing the way couples talk to, think about, and treat each other. What do you want for your marriage? Want some peace? Want to feel close? Want to feel valued? Want to experience marriage the way God intended? Then why not try some Love and Respect.
Dr. Emerson Eggerichs is the president of Love and Respect Ministries and has a Master's of Divinity from Dubuque Seminary and a Ph.D. in child and family ecology from Michigan State University. He was the senior pastor of East Lansing's thriving Trinity Church before devoting himself full-time to building healthy marriages by launching the Love and Respect Conferences in 1999. Emerson and his wife, Sarah, live in Grand Rapids, Michigan, and have three adult children.
Acknowledgments
Introduction: Love Alone Is Not Enough
Part One: The Crazy Cycle
1. The Simple Secret to a Better Marriage
2. To Communicate, Decipher the Code
3. Why She Won't Respect; Why He Won't Love
4. What Men Fear Most Can Keep the Crazy Cycle Spinning
5. She Fears Being a Doormat; He's Tired of "Just Not Getting It
6. She Worries about Being a Hypocrite; He Complains, "I Get No Respect
7. She Thinks She Can't Forgive Him; He Says, "Nobody Can Love That Woman"
Part Two: The Energizing Cycle
8. C-O-U-P-L-E: How to Spell Love to Your Wife
9. Closeness—She Wants You to Be Close
10. Openness—She Wants You to Open Up to Her
11. Understanding—Don't Try to "Fix" Her; Just Listen
12. Peacemaking—She Wants You to Say, "I'm Sorry"
13. Loyalty—She Needs to Know You're Committed
14. Esteem—She Wants You to Honor and Cherish Her
15. C-H-A-I-R-S: How to Spell Respect to Your Husband
16. Conquest—Appreciate His Desire to Work and Achieve
17. Hierarchy—Appreciate His Desire to Protect and Provide
18. Authority—Appreciate His Desire to Serve and to Lead
19. Insight—Appreciate His Desire to Analyze and Counsel
20. Relationship—Appreciate His Desire for Shoulder-to-Shoulder Friendship
21. Sexuality—Appreciate His Desire for Sexual Intimacy
22. The Energizing Cycle Will Work If You Do
Part Three: The Rewarded Cycle
23. The Real Reason to Love and Respect
24. The Truth Can Make You Free, Indeed
Conclusion: Pink and Blue Can Make God's Purple
Appendix A: A Lexicon of Love and Respect:
Reminders of What to Say, Do, or Think to Practice Love and Respect in Your Marriage
Appendix B: Personal Love and Respect Inventory Husbands and Wives
Appendix C: How to Ask Your Mate to Meet Your Needs
Appendix D: What about Exceptions to the Love and Respect Pattern
Appendix E: What If Your Husband Is a Workaholic
Notes